Archive for March, 2010

BYOI – 03/26/2010

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032610famHey there, and welcome to the B.Y.O.I. blog on this crazy Friday. Something seems to be in the air, and the cold seems to bring out the comedy in people. Tonight’s cast included John, Daniel, Oscar Van Pudding, Adam, Ben, and Jon.

John started this night off with a kick giving us the R.E.S.P.E.C.T. The Spot run through. Followed by Adam and Daniel showing us a scene all about tools and tennis to use main physicalities to keep a scene moving.

Oscar Van Pudding always has a great way of warming the whole audience up. Tonight he decided to play a giant game of guess who.

Our F.A.M. tonight was Gary. He was born in MA, but currently lives in Cranston. He likes to scuba dive at the Great Barrier Reef, and is a Libra. He greatly dislikes extreme heights, and his best friend is Rick. Claire is his soon to be born granddaughter.

Meanwhile – A all cast version of ‘A Day in the Life of…’ Gary. Air mattresses blown up in the form of a garaffe, and circus’s that cater to giant giraffes are just a little sample of what happened.

Alphabet – John and a audience member had a good run doing a scene remaking the movie Platoon, John goofed up a little bit, DING! Ben steps up and runs a great scene with the same audience member, only to duplicate a already said line, DING! Adam jumps in and almost jumps right back out as he fumbles his words. Three rounds in, Jackie steps down from the winner’s circle. Oscar and Jon create a new scene, and run with it. However they don’t run far. No one can seem to get through all 26 lines, so we turn a two player game into a three player tournament. Oscar, John, and Ben give it one hella a try. Almost had it with with 23 lines correctly done.

Helping Hands – Oscar and Jon had a great scene all about washing dishes. Oscar has some great hand acting skills, meanwhile Jon does a amazing job creating a scene. Second round, Ben and John had some fun with a couple audience members all about drinking milk and singing.

Beastie Rap – Jon MC’d this show down featuring the full cast for this one tonight. Team 1 was John, Adam, Ben with an audience member vs. Team 2 of Oscar, Daniel, and a couple audience members. After two fails against team 2, an audience member stepped up to the plate to turn the tables and tie it up against team 1. After tossing ownership back and forth we come down to the final round, winner takes all. Congrats to both teams!


Medical Excuses – “Doc, you gotta help me, I got really smelly feet. What do I do?” “Well son, I’m just gonna have to cut off your nose.” / “Doc, help me! I’m addicted to pop-corn.” “I am not pop-corn.”

Dating Game – Daniel has some great choices between Jon (under the bed), Ben (a quarter), and an audience member (always talks in baby talk). Ben has the line of the game with “First if i could get rid of these wooden teeth, then get the eagle off my back!” An audience member (Facebook and homework), Oscar (Emilio Estevez), and another audience member (a hammer) is tonight’s choice dates for John. Great line from an audience member… John asks the simple question, “If we were to go out on a date, what would we do?” His reply, “Nail things.”

Back in my Day – ” Back in my day, we didn’t have… ” / ” Grandpas, we had two grandmas and people just accepted it. ” / ” BB guns, which means you had to use a knife, and everyone said, ‘you’ll stab your eye out!’ ”

Say it Again – Adam and an audience member made a fun scene all about liver. “It kicks you outta the house every Tuesday so my poker buddies can come over.” DING! “It kicks you outta the house every Wednesday so my scrabble buddies can come over.”  Second round had Daniel, Oscar and an audience member. They made a scene all about crappy jobs. So many DING!’s, and so many remade lines that I couldn’t stop laughing long enough to type them out. You have to come see this game in action to understand.

The cast decided they wanted to come out and play Beastie Rap one last time. “I got this friend, and his name is Art.” “I have gas I need to fart.”  AND SCENE!!!

Bring Your Own Improv – 03/24/2010

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032410famWelcome to the B.Y.O.I. blog on this Comedy Wednesday. Great line up of game tonight. John started the show off with his great introductions.

Oscar Van Pudding warmed us all up with a great story about Bob who needed to sell his cat, Fluffy, on the BJ’s section of Craig’s List. Thanks goes to this great audience for filling in the gaps in Oscar’s story.

Our F.A.M. tonight was Kelly from Woburn MA. She likes to stay in a cottage, which is also known as a cabin to her, in NH for vacation. She has many friends, but her favorites include Alex and Michelle.

Meanwhile – A cast version of ‘A Day in the Life of…’ Kelly. Candy stores, Alex’s house, and facebook were just some of the locations involved.

Alphabet – Game started with a good looking run between Adam and Oscar, only to be interrupted by Oscar becoming lost his words. Second round was smooth and silk until someone couldn’t remember his alphabet. Third round was a great round that was a start to finish R to R round. And to finish this great game up, a couple cast members tried to do a round all about Star Wars in just 60 seconds. Great effort!

Helping Hands – Tonight was a first ever, cast body with cast hands against audience body with audience hands. Feeling beards, faces, and temperate, shoes that are labeled as shoes yet worn as hats were just some of what went on. Second round was a fun round all about Bert and Ernie fighting about how one pays the rent and one pays the utilities, but they can’t seem to figure out how to make it fair.

Beastie Rap – Lots of great rhymes, and not so great of figuring our what the leader is going to say. “I got a friend, and her name is Joan.” “My belly really hurts, I think i’m gonna puke?” Thanks goes to Beth who had to step up from the audience tonight to help make this game everything that it should be.


Dating Game – Jimmy had to pick from Jon (without a soul), Ben (always drinking and driving), and an audience member (a game show dad). After many questions, snaps and claps, Jimmy finally decided he wanted to date the game show dad. Second round Jon questioned an audience member (twister coach), Oscar (sunblock), and another audience member (a jetpack). “I just wanna put on some sunblock, take off in the jet pack, and play some twister with you!”

Back in my Day – Back in my day we didn’t have… “skittles, we had to chase down leprechaun to taste the rainbow.” / “Barney, we just had Rubble.” “Lincoln logs, we had Washington Sticks.” “Fears, we loved the reaper.”

Say it Again – Adam is ‘full of awful’ and he needs an audience member to go back in time. Second round was a three person scene about having brain-washing for 30 cents.

Final game of the night, the whole cast came out to play Beastie Rap again. One of our cast member’s middle name is Lee, so Oscar had the great idea to use B, C, and D.

And Scene!!

BYOI – 3/19/10

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031910famWelcome to the after St. Patty’s Day BYOI Blog. Our cast tonight included Jimmy, Beth, Jon, Oscar, Ken, Adam, and John. Tonights show was amazing. Full of many laughs from the many jokes, and even a few tears from laughing so hard.

John gave us the ever great R.E.S.P.E.C.T., follow by Beth and Jon showed us how to act in a different character. Jon was a clown, and Beth was little girl who afraid of, well basically everything.

Jimmy warmed us up playing a great Michael Jordan game. With the audience split into 3 teams to figure out which MJ ends up being the best, the basketball player, baseball player, or the sell out. After learning about as much as we could about the audience, baseball MJ ends up being the best.

Our F.A.M. tonight was Court, we learned that he’s got a friend, Ken, is a ‘golf-kid’ whom helped him break into a golf course when they were kids. He likes to put the tea on in the morning before going back to bed., then helps his mother shop at Ikia.

SHORT CUTZ – The cast portrayed their version of ‘A Day in the Life of Court.’

QUICKEST MINUTE – Jimmy and an audience member made a scene about mowing someones lawn without their permission. 2nd Round – Oscar and an audience member gave us a hilarious scene about self sacrifice.

TYPEWRITER – This story is about Biff, the tattoo artist, portrayed by your favorite cast with the tats, Adam. Poor Biff suffers from ‘Narco-Sleepy’.

BEDTIME STORIES – John is telling his annoying kids a story about a dragon, Harmony. Jon does a great dragon.

IRISH DRINKING SONG – Great song about chicken, eggs, and feathers. 2nd Round – an audience member helped to create a song all about Scrabble.


HOT SEAT – After 2 minutes, Adam gets the Hot Seaat Award. 1 minute later, John takes te cake.

SHOP KEEPER – Non-alcoholic sheep, Dart that doesn’t make Kool-Aid, and his mother is sleeping with all of his friends. 2nd Round – Suitcase that is bigger than the airplane, time capsle from the future, and sex that doesn’t last long at all.

THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY – That was some interesting advice about dealing with weird stalkers. But even better advice about what to do when your dog’s nails grow too long. What do you do when you are going to lose your job? Don’t ask Oscar or Jimmy!

SPACE JUMP – Double the rounds with double the laughs, and all the while, double the crazy non-sense that always seems to work.

And to end the hilarious night, four of our cast came out and sang us all a great IRISH DRINKING SONG all about obesity. Don’t forget to join us every Wednesday, 9pm, and Friday, 11pm, at The Spot.


One show served PAPPY HAINT STATRICK’S way!

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031710famGood evening, ladies and gents.

My name is Ben and for the next two hours, I will be faithfully recording the events that transpire here on this St Patrick’s Day: 2010.  We’ve got a helluva show lined up for all of you.  If only you were here to witness it in person.  (that’s what we call an Irish guilt trip!)

Taking the stage now:  artistic director John Ring, laying down the rules in a (good?) Irish accent.  Oooh, new rule!  There’s wet paint on the walls surrounding the stage.  Watch out, world!

And here comes the rest of the cast!  Adam, Beth, Jimmy, Daniel and Oscar Van Pudding!  God, they look so hot right now.  You should really be here to see it (TWO guilt trips!)  Oh my, and it appears there’s drinking on-stage during the first half.  That’s unprecedented!  Happy St. Pat’s to you, Internet!

Next up–Beth and Daniel telling how it’s done–affirmatively, with a many big Yeses.  And now Jimmy is teaching us how to drink–this is adorable!  Everybody in the audience is getting just a little tipsy.

And now OVP and Adam are telling us the FEATURED AUDIENCE MEMBER is JACKIE K!   Wooooo!  As a long-time supporter, I say it’s about damn time Jackie got picked.

Here are some words that describe Jackie:  Norwood MA, North Carolina, Catholic private school, duck-n-run, apologetic, potentially bully-ish though redemptive, pal=Cameron, dramatic, thespian, Lucy in You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown (Cam was Snoopy), motivation for a script, “two birthday’s ago…”, “let’s just go to New York!”

First game:  SHORTCUTS.  Truth be told: I never played it, and I didn’t really catch the rules, so here’s a fast fact, courtesy of Wikipedia:

Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov (1844–1908) was a Russian composer, and a member of the group of composers known as The Five. He was a master oforchestration. His best-known orchestral compositions—Capriccio Espagnol, the Russian Easter Festival Overture, and the symphonic suiteScheherazade—are considered staples of the classical music repertoire, along with suites and excerpts from some of his 15 operas.

WHAAA???  The scene on-stage was just as random, I assure you.

I just have to add, as the author tonight, that there’s is this weird-ass sculpture next to me and the door.  It’s a weird jellyfish made up of those heavy plastic strips you find over a commercial walk-in freezer doors.  Anyhow, it’s all artsy and stuff, but it smells like plastic death.  Contact high jokes aside, it’s slowly killing me.

Next game:  60-30-10.  A game where the scene must get faster each time we see it: a sixty-second scene becomes a thirty-second scene becomes a ten-second scene.  WHAAA???  First up, Jimmy and Cam ponder the ethics and virtues of duck hunting.  Good god, there are so many bad Irish accents tonight.  152 minutes left to the day–get in those accents while you can, folks!

Whoa!  John Ring comes in as a dog–a real dog, not one of those silly, Pinocchio dogs.

Round Two!

I have transformed into Jimmy…Jackie gives us Cuckooland as some inspiration…cookie! coconuts! making out!

And I’m back to being Ben.  Phew, that was odd, but the making out was hot.

Third game:  TYPEWRITER!

The prompt:  “Snookie” is a “pooper-scooper” but today’s she’s also trying to “get punched in the face.”  Lots of drunk anger from parts of audience tonight–though everyone seems to love the idea.

Lessons learned:  OVP makes an odd gym teacher.  You’re never too old for prom.  And coherent language is for the birds.  Especially if it’s language about birds.  Snookie is not so good with words or birds.  Special children should stay away from bird watching.  Metaphorical punches to the nose = marriage?

Round Two!

This time, the typewriter conceit is more of a bedtime story.  Jackie plays the child and John Ring plays the part of the older male presence (why typecast yourself, JR?)  The prompt:  Xanadu.  The relationship:  Master & Servant.  The object:  Friend.

Lessons learned:  John is a creeeepy older male presence.  Don’t pick the roses!  And the rainbow flag is flown most everywhere these days–that’s good.  Rhyming = in.  Jackie as a child is way too smart.  Are there no workhouses?  Uppity children.  I swear, we give you a FAM inch and you take an “I’m literate and you’re not” mile.  Oh, but this is rich–Jackie is literate, but she is intolerant to the fact that two men in love–in 2010–could adopt!  Well, isn’t that something–sheesh!

In all seriousness: great scene.

Last game of this half:  IRISH DRINKING SONG!  God have mercy on our non-Irish souls!

Jackie joins us for Round One.  The prompt:  a camera!  Jackie lands her punchline very well (have to redeem myself after giving her shit during the last game)… and it appears she’s the only one to land a punch.  Double kudos!

Round Two:  The prompt:  the end of the week!  Much more coherent–wins all around, lovelies!


And we’re back with HOT SEAT.  I would’ve started blogging this sooner but Jackie had to check her Facebook.  True story.  I’m telling you–FAM’s these days.  Anyhow, the game is going along nicely.  People are sitting and then standing upon gross or excessive prompt.  And Adam wins Round One!

Round Two is even faster! Jimmy takes the cake!  Go rounds, everyone!


OVP is keeping shop.  Problems include: toilet paper whose dye stains your tookus, a teddy bear that has a crazy tongue, and a telephone that electrocutes.

OVP enters like a lion and… helps Jimmy with his phone is good measure (great customer service, Oscar!), skitters a bit on Daniel’s leaky toilet paper (not all paper products are the same, friend), and quickly saves the day with audience volunteer Mary and her scary teddy.

Next game:  THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY!  It’s a game of advice, and what did we learn?

Sell your worst stories to Fox, live with two ex-es and sleep with them both on alternating days, ATM’s are easy to rob if you can run fast, hitchhiking is fun, hookers are never a good idea, molded spheres of paint are useful when you work with cannons, cougars distract house guests from uppity dogs, don’t marry… ever, cougars have giant mouths.

Well done, team!

Last game of the night:  SPACE JUMP.  It’s a game of scenes growing and shrinking and here we go:

Prompt:  Sheep.  Sobbing on the phone UP TO father’s leaving UP TO “We’re unionizing!” UP TO dysfunctional family photo UP TO human shooting gallery DOWN TO Kermit’s your photographer? DOWN TO Unionizing is Funionizing DOWN TO the most upset wife and the most despondent child… ever DOWN TO licking teddies!

Round Two!  I was in it.  No time, therefore, to record it.  But trust me:  epic.

Encore!  One last round of IRISH DRINKING SONG about gingers.  You can guess the joke.  They were mostly Lucille Ball based.

Thanks for reading, everyone!  AND SCENE!

BYOI – 3/12/10 is all about Alicia

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031510famHey everybody and welcome to another installment of the BYOI blog

Tonight we have Jimmy, Beth, Oscar, Ben, Ken, Jon and John.

FAM – Our FAM tonight is Alicia. She is Modest, has a boyfriend named Tyler who thinks everything is a game and basically drives like crap. Friend Gian who’s smart, likes computers and cars. Gian’s girlfriend Tippi is a future nurse… but not from the future. OK back to Alicia… She’s shy, bilingual, a Spanish teacher, and likes pickles.

FAMily Dinner – Oscar is Alicia, Beth is Tippi, Ken is Tyler, and Jon is Gian – ‘sorry was just in the parking lot patching up a guy who’s leg got cut off… I put a band-aid on it.’, ‘sorry Gian I know you don’t like foreign languages’, ‘this bromance has got to stop’, ‘GOD D^^N you’re a good kisser’

Story, Story, Die – Driving a long way is the inspiration with Xavier as a mystery – it was a case of mistaken identity, … man around the corner who fed everyone corn flakes, took the tears and put them in a big vat of Jello, the combing method was the new way to cure ham

Sit, Stand, Lie Down – Candy + school yard – You should have been in my mind cause I’ve been playing tons of games in there, you’re gonna grow up to be one of those dropouts, “Someone sit down, I’m getting nervous” – Bobby + Pink – Basil you’re the Thunder Clown, I need a pair of Aces not a pair of Queens, your father never loved you, let’s get some undercarriage.

Hoedown – Medication – “what’s our inspiration?” I’ve got multiple, personalities… hey how’s it going… wait that’s me… still talking, I take pill to get up and to go to bed and even one to pee


What are you doing? – I’m getting sicker by the minute, mating with a giraffe, my legs don’t match up with my body, juggling Ethiopians, Straight and don’t know I’m in a gay bar, tackling fish, future nurse looking for a past life, my hands are flame throwers

Press Conference – Garbage disposal for a toilet in a salt mine with Enrique Iglesias – so if my dog died too I could use this, not just for fish?, Beth guessed salt mine and Enrique Iglesias REALLY fast. – ROUND 2 – Gary Coleman peed on Al Gore – Breaking News… You’re British, How long has it been since you have been in contact with Willis? Ahhh I see you have lost your British accent, Is is just cause you’re the same height as Calvin, “Al Gore peed on ME?!?”

Famous Last Words – Nurse – Alright Precious, your water is about to break – Race car driver – Winners drink milk? But I’m lactose intolerant – Dairy farmer – You’re a PIG-COW – Tech Support – That’s a really simple problem, just…. bluescreen

Six Pack – Keyboard, breakfast for dinner, sleepy recess – ‘I don’t know what to do… poop or sleep’, you gotta plug it in, why did they feed us a full turkey dinner, who’s the teacher here, I want my eggs over easy and you only scramble them, that’s why you’re wearing a diaper – round 2 – August – winter – birthday – What are you talking about August, I don’t know I just get lost in them things, how can we be window mannequins, I’m chafing… customer

AND SCENE!!!!!!!!!

Hi, I’m Jon. First time BYOI blogger long time mispeller.

Birthday Party, Featured Audience Members, Show Recap No Comments »

031010famSo the crowd is coming in, we have some regulars, we have some new faces and we have a birthday party! We have a full house! We here at BYOI love to help people laugh when they get old and decrepit.  So lets start it off….

John Ring comes out and gives the audience the manditory state lawed choices of exits in case of emergency. He also goes over how everyone can participate, and informs them all where the bathroom is.Then he introduces the cast.

We have Oscar Van Pudding,  the tall man -Ben Clareton, the man with the plan- Daniel Lee White, furry faced crazy man-Jimmy Sorrel, and the lovely  and hilarious Beth Hicks!

so yes and that’s how it’s done! Dan and Oscar talk about being a pianist and the dill do’s and dill dont’s.

Beth comes out and warms up the audience with some Mad Men references, gets some of the audience to do a Marilyn Monroe impersonations and touch themselves.  Getting warm in here. Oof!

Ben and Dan do the FAM, we have the birthday girl herself as a new FAM! Her name is Liz,  she’s from Connecticut, she likes Providence. She has family in Ohio, her mom is her favorite relative, she calls her “Momma-Norma”. Someone in her family is a minister. Her father paints, her mom plays church music piano. She hates Kate who works with her and thinks she is a know it all. Marsielle and Ferrez are two of her good friends and join her on the stage. Her friends give us the skinny on Liz, she has lots of tattoos. Her friend is a social worker who makes jewelry when she wants to. Marciella is knocked up, (it wasn’t me)  she’s a war vet and tells us Liz likes pancakes, and will do anything on a dare.

Now for…Family Dinner!  She chooses Ben to play her in the made for stage presentation of dinner time. Beth gets to be Marsielle, and Dan gets to be Ferrez.  Things that made people chuckle, Dixie Chicks, party jacket and everyday hat. Birthday cakes and lots of stuff I missed because the laughing was so loud and because a whole bunch of people showed up late.The show starts at 9pm people! Not 9:15!

Now… Story Story Die! We line up a the cast and we get some audience members to play and tell a story about pickles the bunny, who needs to play agame of Twister. Uh oh our audience member is as funny as the cast. Beth dies, but doesn’t die she just comes back next season. Oscar dies! Now it’s Jimmy and audience member going head to head and the audience is going wild! Oh no! Jimmy dies! The audience member finishes the story making it hillarious and I feel shame.

Now we are doing it again and the audience champion comes back once more to shame us some more.  The story is about our character Stone, going to the D.M.V and waiting. The story is going strong, lots of silly voices going on, our first casulty is our audience member who dies Scorsasee style. John dies gummy bear style,  then Ben kicks off muppett style, and Jimmy wins as a super dork!

Now it’s time for… Sit Stand Lie Down! So we have Dan and Oscar and a audience member that looks like the smaller, younger, fuller headed of hair version of me. The scene is about hot tub.  We have some prostate jokes,  someone is made of cheese, Oscar attempts to do a push-up. Oops the audience member has an annurism, no one helps him, and we have some slap stick that makes people laugh and Ben calls scene from off stage.

Part two of Sit Stand Lie down,  one of our audience members is a organizer for humanitarians, and Ben, Jimmy and John. They are at some kind of factory, and John plays a character from the 1920’s what a stretch! John has a heart attack, they have phone tubes of some sort and it is alot funnier than I can type.

now it’s time for Ho-Down! Oscar takes up the guitar and the song is about Nelson Mandela, John ring starts it of somehow rhmes morgan freeman, Beth flunks history, our bald young audience member does a stellar job, Jimmy finishes it okay. They are going to try again, this time about babies. John rhymes Tigger with whiskey jigger, Beth rhmes times with rhmes and makes it work. Audience member makes it work about not wanting babies at  all, Jimmy rhmes worn with new born, and all the words  they sang were perfectly out of key and hillarious.

Break time!

Were back with the show!

Our first game is What Are You Doing?  We have a lot of audience members up to make with the funny! Creating smurfs with hand puppets, making pop tarts, raking a graveyard,  a whole list of stuff with taxes, tattooing a prego war vet,  a Jewish person tries to sing in choir, making a cake,  tripping the light (comma) fantastic, teaching kids that driving and drinking is okay, giving everything it’s a own noise, eating dumplings at a sushi bar without chop sticks, running on empty, reuniting my high school cover band and finally one upping God.

Next game! It is Press Conference!  Our celebrity is Anna Nicole Smith, she just cut a record, with Michael Jackson. (Yes. We know they are dead, our audience has no class, thats why we love them.) Dan has no idea who he is and he’s out of the gate. He gets some clues and figures out that he is back from dead.  He slowly gets he has long golden hair, still floundering, Jimmy comes over and gives him some banana pickles and gritz (it sounds like Anna Nicole Smith haha, good job Jimmy but Dan doesn’t get it…. uh oh…) Now Oscar tries fan a pit hole spit… Jimmy gives it a rhhming try with ran a rick ol’ smit.  Dan finaly gets it to the enjoyment of all! The crowd goes wild! He easily gets the cutting a new track.  With out to much trouble he figures out that M.J helped him and applause!

Next game is Famous Last Words!  The cast lines up to make with the silly, we get two audience members that jump up happily! Famous last words of a pregnant woman, obituary writer, therapist,  business analyst, plaid and dental floss.If you wanted to know what the last words of those things were then you should have been here because I couldn’t type because I was laughing to much.

Final game of the night!

We have two partners that can freeze thing, two others that celebrate Spider Day, and the last two have “I’m so hungry that I could eat a hot dog or a chito ” . We have ” killed a horse”,  “stepped out for a coffee break”, ” eh ha”,” so what do you think about tomorow? Chinese ?”, “I have seven dead bodies under my bed”, ” One by one killed them all”, “So if you could travel through time like I could?”

One more time!  Team one has “Panda”, Team two has” Pig”. Team three has “Peacock”.  funny lines “Hold on let me look at the label.” (Ben is a Panda and is extremely realistic.) “Now if I lick the dynamite, I think it will work.”  ” his plumage is pluming.”  I’t’s Sunday and we are going to the Tony Awards.” “Sleep with him again?!” Dirty internet porn magazines”.” Put you r bamboo in a particular spot.”  The scene ends with Ben crying because he was a fat panda that couldn’t twirl. It was all really funny, maybe you were here? Maybe you can go back in time and see the show. Maybe you could just come to our next show? Maybe I should stop telling you what to do.   Anyways…


BYOI – 3/5/10 is all about Matt

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030510famHey we got a great show tonight! We have tonight, Jimmy, Adam, Ben, Oscar, Jon, and John

Speaking of tonight we have the musical styling of  Swimmingly Backwards Boys!

F. A. M. – Our FAM tonight is Matt Talarmo, owns a car dealership, can’t read, has five employees, favorite employee is Dumb A**, Worst is the old redneck, very unorganized, works all the time, relationship is ‘complicated’, likes Julie and Julia

Day in the life – “You better not be talking about my spastic girlfriend”, “I think so but I bought lollipops”, “No… the pig broke”, “it’s hard to date a girl who looks like your ex-boyfriend”, “I’m dating the stove”, “god that’s huge”, “who steals a phone from a stove”

Sports commentator – Late night dishwashing has Jon and Oscar started throwing soapy water at each other that progressed into attempted murder. Jon gave Oscar the ‘eye’ literally…

And again… Adam and Jimmy are in the AKC dog painting championships. Adam jumps out and sprays paint in Jimmy’s eyes then Jimmy uses a spray can as a flame thrower. “he’s staying inside the lines”

Say it again – Reptar… Obviously it’s little kids and their dreams, do you see this scroll I just pulled from the wall, It’s such a waste of paper, I made that on scrolling day

And again… Desert in a submarine… That’s the first mistake… two more and you’re off the sub, poke your head up and breathe in as much sand as possible, that’s a picture of my wife before she died

Greatest Hits – 86 albums all about Grapefruit. John and an audience member rocked out a great blue’s tune. Daniel and Adam spat out lyrics and made a great rap song. John rocked out a ‘fruity old man’. The group busted out a country inspired grapefruit throwing song.

Intermission – Swimmingly Backwards Boys! These guys are great, I’m not biased, nope not at all.

What Are You Doing? – Weight lifting in space / feeding the hamsters of death / ‘now you are in the ball’ / cop trying NOT to make a drug bust / water sliding down an elephants trunk /

Party Quirks – Einstein / doesn’t read / platypus – ‘Canada still matter’, it can be used for good or bad, there’s no crying in Canada, I only have big bills, it says ‘welcome to Canada’, ze password is Canadian Bacon, oh wait that is not my pistol

Slogans – coffee ‘coffee, now in coffee flavor’, Facebook ‘never poke so many people in real life’, Southern Image Automotive ‘I’m Southern and this pig’s image’

Revolver – Jon completely complicates the instructions on how the game is played – cheese burger, Halloween costumes, alligators, and pink and purple dodo that became Gouda. Cheese burger date night, a baby comes out of it, but you get to look at them, there are too many babies in our apartment.

Whorlitzer, Your mother, pig-cow, man-zombies – you’re so fat that one animal can’t describe you… I need two, Jimmy and Ben show us a Yo’ Mamma version that compliments



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030310famHey there, and welcome to another Blog for the ever famous BYOI. Tonight was a night of laughs and applauds all around. We even have a special music group, the Swimmingly Backwards Boys!

John opened the show with that same great enthusiasm that we all know and love

Jimmy and Adam showed us how to make a improv scene about yard sales that sell lawn mowers.

Jon warmed us all up by passing an imaginary giant soccer ball around through the audience. Then once it got to Jimmy, it changed unto a giant balloon. and out of no where… it popped. 🙁

Beth and Jimmy introduced us to Andre, our FAM of the night. What does he do for a living? “As little as possible. What is one sound from his ‘Sleep Sound’ CD that helps him go to sleep? “A goodnight from my girlfriend.” Then something new, the whole cast worked together to show us a day in the life of Andrea.

Comentator – Daniel and a member of the audience commentated on Jon’s new Olympic sport, Shin Kicking. Jon kicked and punched John like crazy, then when Adam the ref stepped in, he also got kicked and punched, and the slow-mo version was the best. thanks to Beth to giving the interview after all was said and kicked.

2nd round was comentating on Oscar and Adam competing in dog grooming. Adam can’t seem to get a handle on his dog, while Oscar’s dog is smart enough to groom itself. Then, for no reason, they switched dogs.

Say it Again – Some how, some way, and for some reason, one of our audience members says that you can find squid in your pocket, but thats just what we needed to get this scene off the ground and flying. Jimmy and an audience member had a great scene with Jon ringing the bell like crazy.

2nd round was with Daniel, Adam, and an audience member had a fun scene. Adam’s learned his lesson on turning around and touching his toes and will never do that again. Adam also likes butter.

Greatest Hits – Good Ole Oscar Van Pudding stepped up and rocked that guitar like never before. New hands are always helpful, and encouraged, and we were blessed to get a new hand to help sell this CD.   Jon does a great British punk star, and Adam is just a still a lyrical genius. Tina Turner was in our singer line up, no wait, that was Beth. could have fooled me. Jimmy did an amazing job improv’ing a the late great Frank Sinatra. John and Oscar did a sweet job synchronizing together. Adam and Beth did a nice duet about being sorry.


Oscar and Adam make such a great duo. Swimmingly Backwards Boys were amazing, and hilarious to boot.

What Are You Doing? – There are no evens in my odds and ends. Creating wonderfulness out of Legos.

Party Quirks – Jon is toilet paper, Daniel is Little John, and an audience member pretends to have narcolepsy when he gets bored.

Sloagans – Have you tried A, B, C, or D Trade? Come down and trade with E-Trade.

Revolver – 4 great scenes. Standing in traffic for 4 hours, going to a wedding in your b-day suit, turkey basters, and pepper spray. “Here’s the thing” “Rotate left 4 times!” “Here’s the thing…”

Great show, and great participation from the audience members whom did a fantastic job. Hope to see you all, and more, at our next show, Friday 11pm @ The Spot!