Archive for July, 2011

BYOI – Invisible Russian Ninja Spy

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Wow, we had a full house at tonight’s family friendly show. Cast members Daniel, Joe and Stephanie were joined by auditioners Evan, Erich, Chrissy and Mary.

After Joe taught the audience about RESPECT, Stephanie warmed everyone up tackling alligators in the jungle and jumping for zebras.

Tonight’s FAM was Siara, who is a 16 year old student at a boarding school in CT. She loves math and hates writing papers, much to the dismay of Stephanie, who is an English teacher. The cast acted out scenes from the PBS film about Siara’s life, called “Crazy Schoolgirl,” starring Stephanie.

In the film, Stephanie yelled at her fellow ice hockey players that hockey sticks aren’t needed, because real hockey players play with their souls. Later in the film, Stephanie portrayed Siara’s life as a Russian ninja spy who can become invisible when needed. The film ended with a Broadway number. PBS commentator Daniel warned viewers to watch or Siara will take their soul.

Next up was Grand Theft Auto with hijacking: slimy apemen, sarcastic accountants, sassy arachnids, and extraterrestrial ghosts, among other things.

Good Cop/Bad Cop was played by Daniel (weepy good cop who was horrified that a girl touched his arm) and audience member Josh (bad cop). Evan was caught stealing cookies with his grandpa on a houseboat.

Six Pack was a blast with Evan and Erich playing murderous squirrels, Daniel and Mary fighting over Mary’s impressive math skills, and Joe and Chrissy as a horse and his candy-eating rider.

Highlander with Mary, Daniel, Evan and Stephanie had a scene in Antarctica. The cast needed help bringing equipment into an igloo, then acted like polar bears because polar bears like the cold. Stephanie ended up winning and had to reenact the scene all alone.

After intermission, Daniel and Stephanie did a scene about a wormhole in outer space in Yes, And That’s How It’s Done.

Four audience members, including FAM Siara and her friend Emily, particpated in Pillars. In the first scene, Daniel played a grandfather upset because his grandson Erich didn’t have any applesauce to put his pills in. Erich was the “worst grandson ever” for hiding a cookie the entire time. In the second scene, Stephanie was freaked out about failing a math exam, and Chrissy almost hit Daniel the platypus when her brakes failed.

Evan and Stephanie had to act out scenes in The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. Mary, Daniel and Erich played the counselors, respectively. For a clogged toilet, Mary suggested a call to 867-5309. When dealing with a lollipop stealing coworker, Daniel suggested having HR threaten the offender with a chainsaw, while Erich suggested making lollipops of Draino with tacks in the center and then encouraging the thief to eat one.

Pavlovian Response was confusing for the participants, but fun to watch. Daniel had to sneeze anytime someone touched their hair, audience member Emily had to cry whenever someone said the word “the” and Joe had to laugh whenever someone touched their face or head. They were playing characters making pizza…we think. Unfortunately for Daniel and Joe, Emily had a nervous habit of touching her hair, and then touching her face when she cried.

In Serious Scene, football players were being taught ballet. Evan asked how ballet relates to football, while Erich wanted to learn full contact ballet moves.

The last game of the night was Sing It. Bobby Fischer’s son James (don’t call him Jimmy!) was getting ready to challenge the son of his father’s Russian rival to a game of chess. Joe was making a super chess playing computer, which also makes ice cream. James was told to beat a netbook with a 3 inch screen or he’d be grounded for life. After winning, he kicked a child on the playground with his new shoes. Later, Stephanie bought aluminum shoes made of slides for her gigantic size 29 feet, Daniel and Joe sang about titanium and aluminum, and union workers were eating a meaty lunch instead of working on a house.

Join us next Sunday, August 8, at the Warwick Museum of Art for our 3 year anniversary show at 6pm.

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BYOI – Where is my Vegemite!

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Back in Newport tonight and the audience showed up… but not Erin… she forgot about us. ūüôĀ ¬†Don’t worry about it, she will show up later. ¬†So Myself and Erich one of our auditioners took the show!

Our FAM tonight was Paula who was there with her sisters Diana and Laura.  Paula runs a dental office with her husband Steve and is an adventurous photographer.  She love books about journeys and loves film noir.

Our first game we do a day in her life in 60 seconds, then in 30 on wind boards, then in 10 as a noir. ¬†I think we got it right, but got the wrong tooth. ¬†Next up was Try That on For Size where blowing out a birthday candle was too much for one volunteer. ¬†In Alphabet, Dave the audience member¬†survived¬†an entire 26 line scene about¬†Vegemite. ¬†“Zero idea where it is.” ¬† Next up in Good Cop, Bad Cop, Erich was giving hugs with Madonna on a golf course. ¬†“I think there is a tiger over there in those woods.” ¬†In Angel’s and Devils a father and son went on a fishing journey. ¬†Careful the sin is packing a hatchet! ¬†In meanwhile we realized the Doogie Howser may be an old¬†reference¬†and watch out if you lose a wing.

Hey look Erin arrived! ¬†And so we had a hoe down… that needed some¬†rhythm. ¬†So we finished up with a glorious game of Say It Again where Erin only makes Ham Sandwiches, Erich makes palm sandwiches and their son just got his licence, so he is “out of here!”

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BYOI – Acoustic Collections: the Bike Unplugged

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This Sunday’s show featured Joe, Stephanie, Daniel, Erin and Tyler. Our Featured Audience Member of the night was Sam, a guitar playing eight grader, who likes to ride his bike to his friends house. If he had a band it would be called “Acoustic Collections”. His favorite movie is James Bond and if he had any super power he would fly.

In the first game, the cast acted out an average day in the life of Sam, which includes riding his bike to his friends house, and forming a band called “Acoustic Collections: the Bike Unplugged”. In Excuses, Excuses, Dan had to explain to his boss why he was late for work. On his way in his car wouldn’t start, he spilled something on his shirt and had to buy a new one, and finally his wife was hit by a¬†meteor. The next game was Quick Scenes, then Sit, Stand or Lie Down, in which Tyler and an audience member refuse to help Erin who was hit by a car.

In Catchphrase, Erin was only able to say “Get off my lawn”, and “Where did you hide the money?” Our¬†audience member could only say “Are you Lying to me?” and “I can fly”. Then, in the next round, Stephanie could only say “Why did you do that?” and “The oven’s on”. An audience member could only say “Where’s Nick’s house?” and “Cowabunga, Dude”.

After the break we played Meanwhile, which featured a woman who used unhinged dentures as a dietary system, and Gordon Ramscey’s new show. The next game was Party Quirks, featuring a guest who had a fear of vomiting, Newt Gingrich and a samurai sword, who were all attending a Harry Potter party.

In Story, Story, Die, the cast told the story of Rascal, a cat, who ate mice, but then had an epiphany and decided to form a mouse symphony instead. Next was Revolver. The last game of the night was Greatest Hits, featuring an audience member who was celebrating her birthday, with the greatest songs of James Bond.

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BYOI – I’m Michelle Bachman and I Approve This Baby.

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Today was BYOI’s second show of the day, after performing outside in crazy heat.

Erin hosted tonight and brought us through RESPECT, then Stephanie led us through the cold down (instead of warm up) in Alaskadesh.

Tonight’s FAM was Khym, a former counselor for at risk youth. Her dream is to be a full time musician, and her best friend is “Tiny Elvis”. She hates Britney Spears’ boots.

In What the FAM, the cast brushed their teeth with glass, stood up to parents, and did a horrible cover of the Rolling Stones’ “No Expectations”.¬†Next up was Quick Scenes where a Marilyn Manson cake was ordered instead of a Marilyn Monroe cake.¬†Shopkeeper had Stephanie selling Daniel a rain making umbrella, Erin a magic hamster and an audience member a fire-breathing stapler¬†Next up in Angels and Devils, Stephanie and auditioner Paul were at the aquarium, except it was closed and they ended up in jail, working on their relationship.¬†Questions was next, with Stephanie on the bell, threatening to ring if she didn’t like Erin’s face.

After break, Joe and Stephanie taught everyone it’s sometimes better to relax and respond to others in Yes and That’s How it’s Done.¬†Lines From a Hat/Cup had hooking on a dock, Erin proposing to a catfish and Lady Gaga beating Sarah Palin in an election.¬†Newborn Dill Pickles entered the world, and its parents Donald Duck and Michelle Bachman were very proud.¬†Slogan was next with Parents: Who needs them?…Girdles: No really, I’m a 6…Thongs: Twang!…Pterodactyls: We’re extinct!…Titanic: One way tickets on sale now!¬†Short Cutz was up with Daniel playing a father mad at his daughter Stephanie for only making 54 cents as a hooker.¬†The last game of the night was Curtain Call, with Daniel, Joe and Erin singing. Stephanie learned guitar for the game. They sang about hookers, rashes, sex on the beach, the hot weather, Lady Gaga and smelly armpits.

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BYOI heats it up in Brockton!

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It was a hot show in Brockton and not just because we performed our first outdoor show in over 100 degree weather!  Erin, Joe, Stephanie and Myself entertained the community and brought the funny for their picnic!  Our FAM today was Rob, a stand up guy who loves helping kids, plays power forward, loves his Celtics and caring for his pug named Topaz.

We start off a we a movie review of Rob’s life where we learned how much he really loves his dog. ¬†The quickest minute saw Robin Hood the fast version… with no middle. ¬†Alphabet was a ton of fun with some kids staying in just by great luck. ¬†In Everything Emporium Erin helped us find a swing the bounces, a fork that dances and an air freshener that eats other air fresheners. ¬†With Freeze Tag we saw shrinking steering wheels and and a really small navy. ¬†Then wrapped with Sing It, where we see Rob’s life in his apartment!

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BYOI – The Fibonacci Sequence Statue

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A warm night in RI, but it was cool inside the Firehouse Theater.  Tonight Erin and I rocked the house!  Our FAM tonight was Nicole, a sophomore in highschool, who loves math and art and does nothing but watch Sponge Bob, Cup Cake Wars and get annoyed by her brother.

We start off with a game of pillars where we learn that throwing cup cakes at the pastor is bad and that socks do not go on the door.  In What Are You Doing we learned the wrong way to bathe a dog.  Sit, Stand and Lie down also had a dog in it that really had to go!  But Erin was to distraught by her boyfriend who had left her.  In Good Cop, Bad Cop we got Erin to admit she was baking in school.  And thanks to a helpful audience member we know that she did it with Danny Bonaduce!  In the Quickest Minute, an audience member became Cinderella in the fastest version of the story yet!  Short Cutz saw a Mom who needed to get rid of her kids, and sing it saw in more detail her song based plan on how to get rid of them! A great night in Newport, see you next week!

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BYOI – Kill the Sunshine!

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This Sundays show featured Stephanie, Erin and Daniel. The Featured Audience Member of the night was Dee Dee, a retired social worker and mother of five. In her spare time she likes to line dance, and play with her rescued bunny, Oreo. She doesn’t despise anyone but still can’t get used to Lady GaGa.

The first game was Try That on For Size, which included line dancing, baseball and a cougar. The next game was Freeze Tag with scenes involving toothpaste fairies that appear when you leave the cap off, the world as an appetizer and a man trying to propose with a ring in a chicken salad sandwich.

In the Dating Game, Daniel had to pick between Kathy Griffin, a bottle of Dawn, and a woman who says a word really loud whenever it starts with a vowel. In the end Daniel chose contestant number three, and would just buy a pair of noise cancelling headphones.

Next was the game Typewriter, in which Erin and an audience member rewrote the movie Armageddon into a novel.  In this version the main character is a gas station attendant who is hired by NASA to change the numbers on the countdown clock. In the climax of the novel the main character marries the astronaut, who is in love with the asteroid. In the end the main character sacrifices himself and stays on the asteroid, which is headed for Pluto. The game Pillars involved a crazy hotel check-in.

After the break we played Serious Scene, which revolved around a kid getting his first car.¬†The next game was Marriage¬†Counselor, in which Daniel and an audience member visit Erin, to discuss their problems. The audience member has an obsession with garlic and Daniel is allergic to everything. As a couple they have a problem with no one doing the dishes. In Famous Last Words of Willy Wonka “what do you mean I have Diabetes” and “Can we have them put a down button in this elevator?”¬†The next game was Questions.¬†The last game of the night was Sing It.

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BYOI – The Button Wood Secretary

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In this Sunday’s show, featuring Daniel, Tyler, Stephanie, Ryan, and Erin, things got started off with a ride on a rollercoaster. Our Featured Audience Member was Viv, a retired high school secretary, who is now the secretary for an organization. In her spare time she goes line dancing and her favorite movie is Dog Day Afternoon. If she could invent anything she would invent a hearing aid that actually worked.

In 125-531 Tyler being elected Mayor of the town of Stockholm, the cast line dancing and Daniel and Ryan unable to hear.

Next was Say It Again, in which Daniel, Tyler and Ryan were fighting over stomped wheat, Erin imitated a valociraptor and Daniel took Erin as his “tale-less wife”.

In interrogation line up the cast had to guess the details of their arrests. After a very quick round of guessing they found out that they had been arrested for chewing gum, with their teacher from school, at the White House.

In the Quickest Minute the cast successfully acted out the entire show of Chicago in 60 seconds, then 30, and then 10.

The game Meanwhile featured a cheerleader trying to be a lawyer, who’s client was so annoyed with the cheering that she confessed.

After the break the cast played Tableau, which took place in the bayou, also featured a solid gold dancer bought for entertainment, and a tableau about Stephanie.

The next game was Chainsaw. In which the location was the Taj Mahal, the occupation was a window washer and the object was a dead fish.

In the game Back in my day the we didn’t have secretaries we just didnt answer the phone, also were didn’t have pyramids so our diets were completely off. Back in my day we didn’t have garbagemen and Providence looked about the same.

Next was the game Excuses, in which Ryan had to give three excuses as to why he was late. On his way into work he got a flat tire, his wife was mad at him, and dog knocked the nightstand over and his false teeth fell off.

In the last game of the night the cast had to sing everytime our FAM, Viv, rang the bell.

BYOI – Chocolate Milk on the Rocks

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We’re back to our usual schedule at the Perishable Theatre! Tonight, Tyler warmed us up with random sounds. Tonight’s FAM was Evan, who we mentioned in a past blog post.

Chainsaw was the first game of the night. Daniel’s occupation was an actor, his location was a Thai restaurant, and his object was a facemask. Some of the players’ translations were: homeless person, pie factory, and scalpel.

Daniel, Ryan, Tyler and Erin played Revolver, where the scenes were about the Revolutionary War, a beer bottle in the head, living alone and hating carnies. The players were directionally challenged, and Erin kept having to clarify with “Your OTHER left!”

Good Cop/Bad Cops Ryan and Erin interrogated Tyler (Gandhi) and got him to confess to littering in a diaper factory.

Next up was Sports Commentator with Daniel and Evan. They were talking about the National Grilling Championship Semi Semi Semi Semi Semi Intramural Finals. The competitors were Ryan, Joe and Tyler. Ryan won the competition making “kosher meat, full throttle” using his George Foreman grill, but not before Tyler tried to sabotage him by pulling the power cord and Joe caught on fire and was used to cook meat.

Tyler then started Freeze Tag. Some scenes were about iced wine from Canada, Madonna being exhausted after 4 minutes of concert rehearsals, Scooby Doo finding an EMT’s killer, and a race for beer stolen from a neighbor’s July 4th party.

After the break, we played Rope, choosing cereal, lassoing prisoners and eating Hot Wheels.

Erin then introduced Timmy in the Well, where Joe played Timmy with Lassies Daniel, Ryan and Tyler. Oprah was stuck on the moon.

World’s Worst mentioned Chinese food, Revolutionary War reenactments and EMTs.

Lines From a Hat had a hockey player turned ice skater with sparkly pants and an awkward scene in a park.

Irish Drinking Song about Evan’s new car ended the night.

BYOI Big Auditions

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BYOI is holding more auditions! This may be your last chance till next year to join. You can either attend this event or send invite others who you might think are good for this. ūüôā

July 17th & 24th @ 2pm @ The Warwick Museum of Art.

We are looking to add a few more to this fabulous cast. We have been having additional shows and a few paid gigs and would really like to have more people in the cast to help cover and give people time off.

We are looking for people who can perform in shows in any or all of the following cities: Boston, Newport, Providence and Warwick.

Shows are Friday and Sunday nights. You must be able to pass a background check as we do often work with children.

Ability to play guitar or piano is a plus.

Any questions just email us @

See you there!